Tourettes -a REAL explanation

So since the name of my blog is "Tourettes, Life, and Other Disorderly Things," it stands to reason that I ought to write a post about Tourettes Syndrome. This particular post is going to be in layman's terms (I'm no doctor, so I won't speak like one) and is going to include some of my personal opinions as someone with this disorder (may I point out the word "disorder" as opposed to "disability"). I hope you enjoy!

While I learned the hard way NEVER to ever ever ever post a Tourettes joke on a TS support group page's wall unless you have a hankering for some serious hate your way, I have always been very comfortable in my own skin, and I therefore am going to start this post off with a joke. Why? Because I can! Honestly, I think jokes are always funnier when you can relate to them, don't you?

Q: "How many Tourettesy people does it take to screw in a light bulb?"

A: "Ten plus a therapist! One to hold the bulb, eight to hold the remaining -*twitch* *crash* *shatter*- .....yet unbroken light bulbs, and the therapist to stop the last one from mentally screwing the bulb."

Yes, I know the joke is a little bit dirty, but it brings me to my first point:  
Society's Outlook on Tourettes Syndrome.
It seems like there are two kinds of people when it comes to Tourettes: the 'perverted' and the 'oversensitive.'

Let me start with the 'perverted.' These are the folks who stress the point of the involuntary bad language and crude gestures only a percentage of the Tourettes community possess. The enormous weight they put on this particular tic (involuntary verbal or motor action) is like a kid hovering a magnifying glass over an ant, making the actually quite tiny creature look like an enormous mega-bug equipped to battle Godzilla -and maybe a little more flammable, too. Basically what I am saying is that less than 10% of Tourettesy people have the tic known as Coprolalia -the stereotyped swearing, derogatory remarks, and overall potty mouth, and those that possess it do not always say it out loud -many (most) patients have it on a mental-only basis. I will additionally point out that just as not all people who have Tourettes have Coprolalia, not all people that have Coprolalia have Tourettes. If swearing etc. is their only tic, it is NOT Tourettes because Tourettes Syndrome specifically is a combination of vocal and motor tics, not one or the other. Anyway, to recap, the 'perverted' side of society are the ones that misguidedly assume and emphasize that all or most Tourettesy people say or do nasty things.

Now onto the "oversensitive' types. These are the folks who have cringed every time I used the word "Tourettesy" as an adjective describing people with TS, blow up on people who make TS related jokes, and are overall appalled that anyone ask a direct TS related question to a Tourettesy person or dare ask "what are you doing?" Oversensitives have this weird, blown up idea that people with disorders (or disabilities) might cry or kill themselves or something out of sadness or embarrassment over their condition, and therefore anyone who mentions it outside of the bounds of "you poor dear" should be burned at the stake for potentially hurting the disordered's (or disabled's) feelings.Let me clarify one thing. Tourettesy people usually are born with the condition (definitely with the gene) and show tics very early on in life, so we have no comparison to life with it as opposed to without it. We don't sit around and wish were were like everybody else or dream of what it would be like to not have tourettes. It's just this quirk we have. In fact, some (like me) don't even know when we are doing the tic! It's only when somebody reminds us, "Hey, Kim, I'm trying to take a picture. Unless you want crab-face all over Facebook, come back to reality a moment and smile!" (the crab face is reference to my most distinguishable tic in which I smash my hands into my face and wiggle my fingers like the mouth of a crawdad, by the way.) And as for when people ask us "what are you doing?" I can't think of any reason a person with TS is ever offended or should be. I'd ask too! When I am asked, I simply answer that I have Tourettes Syndrome. Most find this intriguing and ask more questions, which I readily and happily answer. Others say "okay" and move on. No big deal. The oversensatives apologize and dribble all over themselves in humiliation. Ughhhhhh.

Moving on.
What is Tourettes?
  According to Wikipedia, "Tourette syndrome... is an inherited neuropsychiatric disorder with onset in childhood, characterized by multiple physical (motor) tics and at least one vocal (phonic) tic. These tics characteristically wax and wane, can be suppressed temporarily, and are preceded by a premonitory urge. Tourette's is defined as part of a spectrum of tic disorders, which includes transient and chronic tics."

Now, time for the layman's terms. (You're welcome.) 

Tourette's Syndrome (or TS for short) is......

• "an inherited neuropsychiatric disorder" In other words, it is passed down genetically from one's parents then to their offspring, etc. and is a disorder (in this case a specifically mutated gene) in one's nervous system. 
•  "characterized by multiple physical (motor) tics and at least one vocal (phonic) tic" TS includes motor tics (stuff you do with your limbs/muscles/etc) AND vocal tics (noises/sounds made with -you guessed it- the mouth and throat). Always both. Period.
• "tics characteristically wax and wane" The tics will usually come and go or get better and worse periodically. In example, if you have a tic that stays all your life, you will notice that through some periods of your life it was done more frequently than others. Some tics show up at some point only to disappear later to be replaced by another tic. You can have one or both kinds of tics. 
• "tics... can be suppressed temporarily, and are preceded by a premonitory urge." You remember how I called the tics involuntary? They are -who CHOOSES to do these things? However, with concentration, the can be repressed for short periods of time. How easy this is depends on the individual and practice. Any Tourettesy person can tell you that after a bit of repressing the tic, you'll find yourself almost as desperate as a druggie to start doing it again. Even when one does not realize when he/she is doing the tic most of the time, it is still in response to a very demanding urge. 

• "Tourette's is defined as part of a spectrum of tic disorders, which includes transient and chronic tics." This is a recap, so I will do the same. TS is a conglomeration of a variety of tics which can last your whole life or change periodically (or randomly).

 Yep, that's about it.

And finally...

How does Tourettes affect my daily life?

Now, like I said already, having Tourettes all my life, I can't give the most detailed explanation of the difference between life with TS and that without. Nevertheless, I am neither blind and can therefore state the obvious differences.

While some people require medication, I do not because my TS is pretty self-manageable. However, I am subject to a few minor limitations by "regular people" standards. Other than the odd glances and curious questions thrown at me when I perform a tic, I often find myself in aggravation when it comes to meticulous projects and time management. The constant flexing of the muscles in my forearms (like over 70 times a minute -try and see if YOU have the muscle strength to do it that fast) is harder for me to control and therefore I tend to burn myself cooking, cut myself cleaning, and otherwise make a mess of things. As for my scrunching (that crab-face thing I spoke of earlier), I don't even know when I do it, so I will lose several minutes (and even hours with nobody to stop me) without realizing any time has passed at all. You can imagine the difficulties associated with THAT problem. 

There are also certain jobs I cannot safely apply for. Anything concerning food preparation, serving, or whatever is something I would be unable to do because I touch my face too much without realizing it -NOT allowed in any restaurant or fast food place. Furthermore, janitorial positions would be a bad idea for the reason that touching my face could potentially put harsh or harmful cleaning solutions and chemicals against my skin (and on a personal note,who wants potty or trash on their face? Ew!). That isn't saying I don't cook or clean in my own house, but you know. Other jobs I should not apply for are things like secretary or accountant -anything relying on a good sense of time-management, as explained earlier. There are plenty of jobs left, and even these places would not be allowed to discriminate against my TS, but I would be highly inefficient at some, and downright 'dangerous' at others. Besides, I don't see any of these as a real loss. I intend to get a teaching degree or a psychology degree, myself. 

As for raising kids, I am a good, attentive mom, but I know to have distractions available for my toddler during the times I do unknowingly sidle into a long tic session. Nick Jr is my hero at keeping my daughter out of trouble while I'm out of it! On days that I feel my TS is a bit harder to control than others, diapers are changed on the floor rather than on the changing table so just in case I get scrunching, the kid can roll wherever she wants to and not hurt herself -you can't fall off the floor, after all. And yes, my baby girls (the toddler and the one in my womb) carry the TS gene and have a 75% chance (99% if you are a guy, btw) of showing tics. My firstborn is already scrunching. ^^ Hey, she looks like her daddy, so she's got to take after me in something!

So there you have it, folks! Tourette Syndrome in a nutshell. May awareness be spread and jokes be told! Also, if you know any CLEAN Tourette's jokes, feel free (aka PLEASE DO) share them in a comment at the bottom of this post! Much love to all! -Kim